I'm at a work party and I don't know how to drink socially. You know, like slow?
He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.
A freshman just woke up on our back pourch... He swears there was a party here last night but we didn't have one
just put cider in my bong. gotta love fall
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just saw a Puerto Rican child between the ages of 8 and 11 with a faint mustache talking very loudly on the bluetooth in his ear about how "Skittles are played the fuck out"
just saw a guy driving a atv down the highway in a tux.... only in Iowa...
I puked in the revolving door and had to sit down on the escalator. That hungover. It's safe to say people are judging me.
Wackin it to the USA womens soccer team. My own personal way of saying job well done.
The sales associate looked at me funny for wobbling in the heels i was trying on until i told her i was trying to see how well i'd be able to drunk walk in these tonight
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The cops said we could pay $250 or spend the night in jail and get 2 free meals. I might pee in mail-boxes more often
she brought my homemade cookies with condoms taped to the box... im in love
I look like one classy bitch running in heels through my backyard while carrying a small dog and a large bottle of booze. How am I still single?
Seems like you've kicked summer 2012 off well.
The ratio of last drink to last smoke is so tricky. This could go on until the booze is gone
Accidentally made a bowl of macaroni and cheese with a bottle of vodka. It's not that bad
My brothers dog was hit by a car and died. They're really sad about it.
But they're having a baby! It's like a dog only 40 billion times worse!
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