I learned much from the teen babysitter: I can light a cigarette in a microwave.
she burped and cried multiple times. it was like i was getting head from a baby.
dude if Megan calls say you Sis was house sitting for me yesterday , she f'n found dana's panties
just because she blew him doesn't mean she knows his name.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we should become lesbians. not together. just in general.
I'm ready for this little girl to leave so I can hit the bong already
He doesn't have any game.. I mean, his one move is forwarding chicks pictures of his penis.
There is a bottle of ciroc waiting graciously on my breakfast table. It's almost a sign for me to live up to my Russian blood.
my longitudinal study of the long term effects of sloth and alchol-intake is nearly complete.
so you are graduating this semester.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I chugged vodka from a 15 ft snorkel. What the fuck did you do with your life today?
You just said the word 'slut' out loud in your sleep and then made a moaning noise
Between fucking and sleeping I woke up missing four out of five of the earrings I was wearing. It's like a star rating system. I had to give him props.
Grandma and I are gonna see the new Tarzan movie, because we both appreciate shirtless Swedish men
We found him sitting in the back of the club crying into a strippers lap. She told us he missed his pet frog and to come back later.
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
Randomize