I want to kish your cheek
My cheeks are in Michigan
Oh my lips are kind of stretchy
ha- omfg whatt the fuck is wrong w me. Alcohol+third cousins= bad decisions
i was focused on more important things... like standing, and not spilling my beer
He kissed my cheek and I could smell it the whole way home like shit
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you should give me head with plastic fangs in
smoking a bowl while I'm peeing. i love having a big dick.
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
Might just stay in and drink cuz of the hurricane. Yea I think Wisconsin might be safe but its a good reason to drink.
I found him with a guitar and his kitten in his room. He was singing a song he'd titled "you're a cat". Guess what most of the lyrics were...
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KNEE DEEP IN HOES. SEND HELP.
Dude, he threw a pool chair off of an 8 story building. It was a successful night I'd say.
If you want me to retract my crazy cat lady comments pictures of yourself dressed as a cat are not the way to do it.
He peed my bed and tried to say it was just the wine. The red wine. On white sheets. He's not a good liar.
I owe you an apology, I was appointed captain of this sexy fuckship and I fell asleep at the helm.
I still dont see how i drunkenly impressed your mom
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