O no, u 2 are dating again?
No. I just masturbate furiously to his picture
oh vodka. i could write you a sonnet.
Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
So i just found out i replied to my room mates craigslist ad. Akward
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Getting business cards printed for tonight. Would you rather be: 1. Vice President of Argentina 2. Celebrity Dental Assistant or 3. Dial-Up Internet Technician
3. Dial-Up Internet Technician.
I may have to steal the boat sober, but I feel that would be harder to explain.
C'mon pople!!! THursday afternoon isnot gonna drinkin itself!!!
I don't trust myself to shower and not drown.
There should be a promo code on the Papa Johns website for "I have no moneys but if you send a cute delivery guy I will pay him in blow jobs."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They've taken all the lighthearted fun out of S&M.
I just got fingered in the Win-Co parking lot for pills. How's your meltdown going?
Jesus christ. I put you on speaker when you called me last night and you told me to brush my teeth with a dick.
I am the most hated person in hoboken. Ive been doing drunken cake boss impressions down the street for the past 20 mins.
You're moving up the public shitting ladder
the twins are trying to figure out which one is the one doing body shots off a janitor in this picture
Randomize