Don't look now but I am in class with a mixed drink
Don't look now but my prof just asked me if I was drinking a screwdriver
physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
For some reason, my father is not responding to the 5 texts I sent him that all read: "Dad dad dad dad dad dddaadd dddddaaaaaaaaad dad".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Another one? Damn, how many David's is that?
six.
Oh, I thought it was higher.
No, that would be the Matt's
Weekend has begun hello red wine at 10am on a Wednesday
I will come to your office dressed as a bloody mary, hug you then leave is that a good plan?
yes. bring a barf bucket too. just. in. case.
how is it that I keep meeting up with you when Im drunk?
you stand on my porch screaming my name until I come out with you...
i just had to pick up my 18 year old cousin from the police station for hosting a party, and i had to do this stoned wow
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
im lying in bed trying to choke myself out because being awake hurts too much
When in doubt, it's too much cheese
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
What has my life come to that I have to spank someone in morse code?
just woke up and had to check if i still had pants on, i really need to stop drinking
Tell me that I didn't just get ash in my Russian and just mix it TF in bc who cares and life has no meaning.
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