More tranny stories later!
we have pet lesbian snakes
Just got done shaving my balls. You were right.
I came home drunk to my night light on and a Hershey's bar on my bed. Mom knows me too well.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just bought condoms at Big Lots. please save this text so you can laugh at me in 9 months
you left a paper here that says 'to do list' but it looks like you just wrote "drink a bunch of cough syrup and watch Who's the Boss" like 60 times
Her life is proof that being a drunken slut will get you places.
it's 2:30 on a sunday and I just won a wine chugging contest. I'm never graduating.
Being invited to eat tater tots at 1:30am by a rly hot girl then actually only eating tater tots is a major let down. Tasty, but still a let down
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I want someone to sweep me off my feet and you want someone to fuck you on the kitchen table. They're both perfectly logical needs.
Also, nothing screams "don't talk to me because I'm unstable" like walking around eating cookie dough out of the package.
My phone keeps autocorrecting to the "st. Natty's Day Parade" and I'm completely okay with that
Future roommate keeps sending me pictures of cool shit she has for our dorm and I'm just like "... I have a set of Aggie wine glasses a great set of tits."
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
Next guy I fuck must be a cowboy
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