I don't know what happened last night but I woke up this morning with "wolf pack" tattooed on my knuckles.
You know you're hung over when your pose in art class is lying face down on the platform
the protein jug says add 2 scoops to your favorite beverage. guess who just found a way to make sam adams healthy? THIS GUY
dunno man, last I saw him he bet me he could eat more ranch the me, then ran off
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You NEED to fuck him he's a doctor with one leg. Are you kidding me right now. This will definitely make the list. Plus he buys all of us drinks.
So I woke up in a strange bed with a note taped to my arm giving me directions back to my brothers apartment.
I drove your lawn mower home. Hope you don't need it tonight. I'll bring it over tomorrow.
She was giving me head while we were in my tree house, my mom then came out to let the dog out so she stopped so I would stop groaning, was it good? You tell me
Omg, you would have loved the guy I almost hit with my car tonight
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i just thought a plastic bag was my cat. i just pet a plastic bag. that high.
Just caught myself trying to make grilled cheese with the stove off. I think my dad knows I'm high.
Well as if this year didn't suck enough already, I can now count 2015 as the year I got chlamydia
Sara can't come to the phone right now. She's currently having an in-depth conversation with a flower pot.
He's smoked my weed, stolen my cigarettes, and used my campus cash, but I try to initiate sex and NOWWW he's all "As your RA, that's a line I can't cross"
You’ll (maybe) appreciate that I picked at my ingrown hair again. Quarantine updates are getting BLEAK.
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