woke up in Sigma Chi. In his room. they are iniating pledges right now. Holy fucking shit mother of pearl.
Just got my econometrics book in the mail and started flipping through it. Our Thursday parties may turn into u convincing me not to kill myself.
i got a blow job in the bathroom during intermission at the hockey game. i'm pretty sure i made Canada proud.
He;s fine. He just kept saying "hurricane Gordon is coming to shore" and flexed his muscles a lot.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Alright. I will breast feed the first person to get here.
I'm going to superglue stuart's hands into socker boppers
I think my whole family judged my ability to change under a blanket.
In a moving vehicle and other people in the car
ok is that genuinely the first four bars of mozart's symphony #40 sharpied onto my arm or
It was almost as bad as the time I peed on the floor of the Pentagon's subway station.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently "I have the beer shits" isn't the excuse my boss wanted to hear. So sue me
He put on a roller derby documentary. It was either bore myself to death watching that or take off my dress. He was very appreciative.
Props to you. You took the bet seriously. Making out with her for an hour right after she spewed
Man. Apparently I blacked out between the 4th margarita and my air mattress. Asleep in my jeans at 10pm. Mom outdrank me again.
"Because this is an ongoing legal matter" is how his morning after sex text began. So...
I do not recommend playing football on LSD like at all
Randomize