I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
Dude you just kept yelling "She was my first asain!" right in front of her.
seems the shocker is way more shocking if u get the fingers wrong
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I will give everyone a free pointer today. Here it goes, always pee by the house late at night to avoid getting shot by drunk bastards with guns. Never go by the tree line.
dude i just made a burrito by wrapping 2 packs of scooby snacks with a fruit roll up. im so high
just got super drunk mixing jägermeister with my lyme disease meds. even if my face goes paralyzed, at least i got smashed from it.
i just kept saying he was red & i was blue and we couldnt become purple. I started crying at one point
Dude, I think someone on your skype account may have seen me beat off. I used your computer and didnt realize you were still signed in. Please tell me no one was on...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like a cloud. A cloud that wants to be laid.
Any chance you used one if the curtain rods in the fireplace room as a sword? One is missing
He said I was really mad at him on Friday. Dude I fell asleep in all my clothes and shoes, with my flashlight on, on my phone... I could have been mad at the wall. It wasn't my classiest day.
I just remembered touching your bosses wife's fake tits last night. Thanks again for taking me to your work function.
that awkward moment when you use blowjob jokes as a segue into coming out as bi
OMG. When you threw the used condom on your floor you threw it in my purse!!! I just went to grab my headphones and it was stuck to them!
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