Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
who put toothpaste on EVERY doorknob in my house?!
I have officially made out with every girl you've made out with, even the random you met on the Mexico flight
He wasn't eating out, he was performing a hysterectomy without a license....should I be worried about my future family?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That one life defining moment when you catch yourself pouring whisky into your hot chocolate at 4 am, whilst crying and talking to your dog.
How do I know I'm high? Let me count the ways.
1. I put the milk in the cupboard, 2. Everything tastes fucking amazing, 3. My dog is really soft, 4. The lunesta butterfly flew out of my tv and touched me
I refuse to apologize. Any dick that comes that close to my face uninvited is gonna get bit
DONT EVER DUNK OREOS INTO WINE . NEVER
His balls looked like two miss shaped chicken nuggets
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You told her dad that you were gonna "superman that ho" I love the first impressions you make
I dont think I should be allowed to pick my own boyfriends anymore
Strange request but for my birthday you should get me one of those vibrators that you can plug into your iPod that go along with the music.
he just cleaned his wound with pinnacle whipped
I've sent two unsolicited tit pictures in less than 24 hours. I'm the female version of a fuckboy.
Ive completely stopped wearing makeup. Not even eyebrows. Thats how sick of wisconsin I am.
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