I am drunk raised to the nth degree. The possibility of getting sick is approaching infinity.
He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
i walked into his room and he was eskimo kissing his weed..
He wore homemade jorts on our first date. I'm not sure if I should leave now or embrace the white trash lust and marry him
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There's a wake for a coworker on 420 during te time of 420... Hoping everyone will be too sad to notice how high I am.
Let's just say that watching the sunrise in a space helmet is really the only way to do it.
Roommate is high and swore off off the diet. Said she wants to make everyone else fat since it'd be easier. She spent today baking 3 dozen brownies for the office tomorrow and is already down to 24.
we are all four or five tequila-induced decisions away from shitting in a bucket, come get me please.
winnie the pooh came out of nowhere and offered me a burrito...it was a fucking amazing burrito.
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We had sex in the bathroom. Good sex. Toilet breaking sex.
Nothing worse then being at the gym on the elliptical next to a guy looking at porn on his phone
we fucked in the backseat of my car at the observatory, right under the stars. it was a starry, orgasmic filled night
Let's put it this way, there's not many girls I wouldn't let sit on my face
Just because your drunk doesn't mean you can stick your dick in the snow. Just a FYI
woke up between a girl's legs. make your own conclusion.
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