U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
I feel like Captain Hook just gave me a pap smear.
We had sex on a ferris wheel in canada, our relationship will never be the same
In the sauna. Drunk. When I close my eyes I think I'm a dog. Is that wrong?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Life gets in the way of sexy Saturday sometimes
He was having Sex and you yelled 'hot and dangerous!" and he responded with "if you're one of us then roll with us!" when he went to he bathroom I saw her getting dressed, looking mortified.
OMG. Hung over at my grandparents house. Threw up on 3 T-stops, countless snowbanks, and the grandparents driveway. Was proposed to last night. Bruised from head to toe from falling down 3 flights of stairs. Debating my intelligence because it seems that "happy new years" is too hard for me to spell. How were your new years festivities?
so when he he finally wandered back into the room it was with a pound of cream cheese which he ate in 5 minutes flat and then passed out
Dad's teaching me to make moonshine this weekend as "college prep". How scared should I be sis?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She said she wouldn't get out of hand. When the cops showed up she jumped off the 4ft high porch and fell into a ditch. She then buried herself because she was wearing light pants and though the light from the cops flashlights would reflect off her pants. We couldn't find her for 40 minutes.
this is gentle reminder #1 not to forget to bring the vibrator when you come
Officially locked in my status as an indifferent millennial by downloading Tinder.
Some girls wake up to good morning texts. I wake up to pictures of an angry Shrek getting a blowjob.
We stood outside the room listening to them have sex and making meow noises
That's not right, is it?
are you still alive?
no.
i'll cry at your funeral. and leave a burrito by your tombstone
Randomize