we gave some random guy a shot for shoveling our sidewalk.
How are you feeling today?
i could've thrown up on command at any point today...
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
Just so you're aware, tomorrow is "Slow Clap when you see Mike" day.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
He said hes taking shrooms and watching jurassic park so we're making a t-rex costume
we need ur ladder
I just threw up trying to put pants on. This is obviously a sign to stay naked.
I was so drunk, I was kissing everyone. Their sexual preference was none of my concern.
I can't look at him without thinking about his cum face
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just drug him and when he wakes up say "You just woke up from a coma, we've been married for 5 years." It'll be like The Vow but fucked up.
currently googling "apology gifts for when you poop on their floor"
I'm trying to be sexual and you're sending me smashmouth lyrics
does having sex with an episode of House playing in the background count as studying for my MCAT?
I woke up in a bathtub full of green and blue Nickelodeon slime! wtf?!
Grandma had me open the boxes that were delivered today. She got a sex swing, I've settled on "You go girl" as my official reaction.
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