mutual masturbation is only cool if cash money records is involved.
Non-Jews are for practice
bowling with tennis balls and shot glasses. whatever you dont knock down after 2 rolls, you drink.
This from the guy I found eating salad out of a pot lid in his boxers on his porch last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I still can't believe he turned down that threesome with us in central park. He must be really committed.
At front desk. Got a beer drinking pigeon.
Apparently I told a girl last night, that's she's super beautiful and I don't want to fuck she just deserves being eaten out
Question: If I got in a car accident and lost my memory of us, would you work your way back just so we could be fuck buddies again?
I'm watching The Vow and just need to know that I'm loved in some way
Now that we have successfully procreated, I need to know we are on the same page. Please tell me you are aware that there are whole seasons of our lives that our child can NEVER be made privy to.
We should probably write this down. That's a shit load of shit.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
shotgunning beer in rite aid bathroom. hurry
Considering who their parents are, maybe you should use vodka for the baptism.
I won the 'drunkest person at a family event' award tonight.
Does going to a local bar count as taking part in Small Business Saturday? Asking for a friend
Dude, what the hell where you thinking last night
Welllllll basically they were like "challenge" and I was like "accepted"
She was drunk running in the middle of the street when a cop saw her,picked her up and dropped her off at her house. This really doesn't surprise me.
Randomize