Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
It took my four years to get this degree, and 4 hours to lose it, My parents are not impressed.
Who would win... a chainsaw pooping pterodactyl or a bear with machine guns for feet. big debate about this right now
i could have sworn she did an overextended split with her legs over her head but now i think it was just the drugs
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I guess I just got drunk and ordered a mini fridge off the internet. At least now I know the 200$ that was missing from my checking account wasn't spent on lap dances only.
You were hanging upside down on the subway with your feet in the stirrup handle bars. the children were amused.
help me choose which girl to send myself boning to my girlfriend to make her want to break up
which one looks the most like her?
Come down. Bring Jorts. We're getting ready for this tricycle race like champions.
This is NOT the time to take our hits and go to Disney. Let me repeat that. NOT THE TIME FOR DISNEY ON ACID
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I found an inside smoking lounge. I'll be here for the next 4 hours. A nice old Canadian lady has befriended me and let me use her lighter. Fuck Hartsfield-Jackson AND this layover. I win.
You told me to keep you from drinking, but we both know I'm not that kind of friend.
The trash can in my living room is full of Popsicle sticks and my vibrator has taken up permanent residence on my coffee table. I'm not doing anything productive. Clearly.
Mom and I shoplifted today. Her idea.
Retirement sounds fun.
When my parents ask, do you think "he was the cop I gave head to in order to get out of a speeding ticket" will suffice as to how we met?
Crazy homeless man drinking beer out of a vitamin water container on the bus just set me up on a date with the yuppie next to him
Randomize