yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
There needs to be a term for a female version of a rusty trombone
why does he think he needs to feed/take me out to get some ass? we are at a bar wasting my fucking time
My mom seriously just told me my insurance company pays for rehab. In an email. I expect a real, not just us joking, intervention coming on. I'm not accepting a "lunch date" with that bitch.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She sucked my dick while i watched james bond. And they say marriage sucks
I walked into a McDonalds at 8:30 am with a half-eaten apple and a solo cup. Never felt so judged.
It's gameday bitch. Man up.
Well he's a 33 year old furniture salesman that picked up at 19 year old buying a bedroom set for her room. I can see how that would be awkward
I want a bottle of whiskey to be dropped at my doorstep like a stork drops babies when they are delivered to their parents.
God what have you done to be that much in need of alcohol.
Me WANTS my preciousssssssssss
if it looks like there's being an exorcism being performed you know your doing something right.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm in his bed. I got up to puke. Im one eyeing it eating a hot dog bun. Wtf. This is my life
Nate is still in lock up because when the cop informed me he'd shit his pants in the squad car I declined to post bail.
I may have made out with your roommate and your cousin tonight. In my defense I thought both of them were your cousin.
I think I'm more excited for Santa to come now that I made a drinking game out of it
Long story short wrist restraints, Apple Watch and cumming all don’t mix
Bud light made chelada as a breakfast for those of us with class at 8 am
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