you went up to their shower, tripped in it, accidentally turned it on and then claimed that you like to "test everyone's showers"
Talk about the highs and lows of a night out: had a threesome, then got robbed at knifepoint.
got so drunk i was kicked out of my own birthday party and tried taking a bottle of vodka with me
He googled the address of the bar, then sent me a text saying "6.3 miles. Too far. :( Apparently I am only worth a 5 mile radius.
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dude, i woke up with a mini keg on my night stand. again. like wtf
well, duh, but it's like you don't even want to see me masturbate with a wine bottle.
Yes, i finally made it. but let me tell you...i can smell myself right now in class right now, this scent is called alcoholism.
Fortunately for myself I'm twice as smart and half as drunk as everyone else. All things considered I'm leaving here three-to-five times richer than when I arrived.
Im going to hell in a hand basket. With a ribbon tied to my head. I'll be like a puppy for the devil.
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Shirtless guy staggering down the sidewalk, puking into a Prada shopping bag. Ahhh, the walk of shame in Boystown.
You were laying in a hotel bed drinking beer from a straw while you demanded everyone to kiss your foot tattoo.
I know. His dick was small at the top and got bigger at the bottom, like a fucking curling wand.
plus like he's kinda a piece of shit. a beautiful somewhat talented piece of shit that hella needs to get his life together
she just kept pointing at the cows and calling them field penguins
Why does 10AM Spanish always turn into a discussion about my sex life?
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