Whatever. They have the same name, so it's not even cheating. It's brand loyalty.
Apparently I climbed into a dryer last night and refused to leave... There are pictures to prove it
I just figured out that you can toast a marshmallow with a butter knife and a cigarette lighter. I'm like a retarded Mister Wizard
I give you the lube, you make me the mac and cheese, that's a pretty fair deal I think.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
passed a homeless guy with a sign that read "420 vetran" we gave him a bowl of bud
you said you would race him to taco bell but you slipped in the parking lot and just laid there, crying
My stalker sent me an erotic poem. Who knew anyone could find a way to rhyme birth and girth so eloquently?
you slapped the bag of goldfish out of her hands and screamed, "BITCH THIS AINT NO AQUARIUM". That's how fucked up
I need a genital shamwow being this wet.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He also ordered me a vibrator last week, so the flowers kind of balance it out
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
She stopped me mid sex to ask if she could finish my ramen, I've found the one.
Just heard a 15 minute program on the radio about how cases of gonorrhea in the throat and rectum are skyrocketing in the US. Almost crashed laughing so hard.
Sorry, who is this??
Yeah. I fucked her boyfriend, she knows, and she still wants to keep dating him. That's love.
True life: I inadvertently fucked a whole friend group. More details to come tonight.
Randomize