I have no memory of puking on someone. Was he cute?
tried unsuccessfully for 10 minutes to do bong hits while wearing glow in the dark vampire fangs before realizing air was getting out of the sides of my mouth
My hispanic family watching the world cup is getting too intense for me. a lit candle was just thrown at me because i walked by the tv.
Is it bad that John just came to my work to have sex with me bc I felt bad that he slept on his porch last night locked out and I missed all his calls?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He was standing in the front door with a kareoke machine yelling at the neighbors as the unloaded their van
Just headbutted a photographer. This convention just got really interesting.
sex in a tree stand. check.
you lucky bastard
Just woke up with an eye that wont open, a half eaten piece of pizza on my chest and a raging boner.
We were tripping too hard to figure out to tell him where we were so we sent a picture of me laying outside the tent saying "find us"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And as the acid sets in, he looks back at the shallow form he used to call his and whispers "3 pee pees strong"
It's official. Post baseball sex is better than post hockey sex. I hope the Blue Jays win the world series.
Let's be honest, college orientation is going to be "here's how to drink everclear"
Let's just say that I took off my pants and I had superman boxers on. Then she took off her pants and she had batman panties on. I think she's the one!
I woke up completely naked in a mint condition 71 chevelle in someones garage. What.
Last night we proved the theory that "harder" is the worst rough sex safe-word ever.
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