Would it be quicker to bike the freeway home?
Also, I'm sitting at a crosswalk watching two Mexican gangs fight each other. I miss you too. A lot.
One girl and one boy is just not enough.
I don't think he understands what an important role his penis plays in my level of self esteem
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Okay. I really need to get out of this guys bed and get home. It's two in the afternoon. He's not even HERE.
I think I suffocated him while I was riding his face
You need to simmer down or I'm going to buy you a labia leash.
She called my landing strip a "vagina mohawk"....
Lesbians are weird.
I'll even be awesome and bring pizza for your family, just as a "hey thanks for letting a stranger get trashed at your house" gesture.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just tried to make cleaning gasoline off your shoes with toilet paper in the Chemistry Building bathroom look normal. I failed.
Go forth my little lesbian, get your gayme on
Guess who was PASSED OUT ON A BMW. I shit you not
Stop it right now
This time face forward
You know that you're in a bad spot when the doctor puts you on 500mg of amoxicillin 4 times a day for ten days and puts refills on it...
It was ok until his mom walked in and asked if he turned on the crock-pot...
I would but he’s not speaking to me because I put ketchup in his socks.
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