meet me in the bathroom in 10 mins.
wait what? who are you hooking up with in the bathroom?!
aww shit wrong text.
her teeth looked like a whores toenails, i was too horrified to
Turns out, Windex will cut right through semen stains on a computer case.
ARE YOU ALIVE? usually when i say lets start drinking at inappropriate times you come right over. im worried
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
making your facebook status TEQUILA is like basically saying "im easy tonight. feel free to take advantage"
He's trying to row the canoe up my front yard like he is Lewis and Clark.
Memorial weekend is going to be amazeballs. Jungle juice, drunk guys, and my vagina being stimulated by the vibrations of a 4 wheeler. I mean there is no way that can go wrong.
If sitting in the car passing a flask back and forth because the bar we go to is having some power issues on Christmas eve isn't Christmas spirit, then I don't know is.
She found my wedding ring, sallowed it and wished me good luck explaining it to my wife before walking out. Now what?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It is very possible that having sex with you just now just got me into Yale
I may be going to Mexico. I just met a drug dealer at a strip club. Seems legit.
There is a midget in cheetah face paint on a leash here
I was simply suggesting that you really should try coke bondage sex.
HE CALLED HIMSELF HOT BAR GUY.
If I remember correctly he wasn’t
when ur drunk laser tag is all fun n games. try it high and all of the aliens in the galaxy want you dead.
Randomize