when people say theyve been sober for however many years is that like couple beers not drunk sober, or no drinking sober?
We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
Girl next to me just said "as a guy I used to sweat but not I don't. it's awesome" Oh. My. God.
splinters make it hard to masturbate
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just bought two budlight beers with a can of tuna at the bar
he came on my stomach and it was 1000 degrees in his car. i smelled awesome.
I woke up to the sound of a beer can being opened. I love him already
Those people having sex on the beach kept looking over at you guys throwing his shoes at the seagulls.
It's like the god of all feather dusters, but for your vagina
It really is the softest mustache
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They should just send me home - I'm literally doing nothing but watching porn and listening to pandora.
Have you seen our bachelor? He's MIA. Last seen being led to some hookers by Kanye look-a-like.
Christopher Columbus didn't sail the ocean blue so I would have to go to class and not have sex with my boyfriend
High-fiving last weekend's hook up in passing on the way to class has given me quite the lady boner.
If u ever apologize to me for "too-rough" sex again I will suspend ur all-access pass to my vagina indefinitely
i was making a gravity bong in my room and my dad walked in. he helped me finish. i love being home for the holidays.
Randomize