A big part of growing up is learning how to tastefully stare at women
As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother
i was so high that i was eating crumbs of my bed only to realize they were fuzz thingies. fml.
I need a creepy friend to scare off the other creepy people
I would be honored to be that friend.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there was a 40 knocked over. chips and salsa all over the floor. and she was in her thong doing boot camp on demand in the middle of the room..
this must be what syphilis tastes like
I woke up with a fake mustache stuck to my chest and I can't even hold down water.
I don't know what's worse the the fact he has worn a protective cup for last 3 years in fear of being kicked in the balls. Or the fact that the one day he decides to throw caution to the wind and doesn't wear it and actually gets kicked in the balls.
Who in tha hell do u hang out with?
Rule of thumb; if you ask me if my tits are fake you will not get to touch them.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my brain is opting to stay half drunk rather than relearn how to think. the rest of me is in no position to argue.
He broke up with me because "we're at different points in our lives" I think it's because he saw a drag queen with their hand halfway down my pants
multitasking: i'm now sitting up and smoking my joint.
Omg this is like trying to sleep on a pile of ballsacks.
We had sex last night...... This "Friends" thing is going well.
So I took my bra off and threw it in the bushes before we went to the bars..
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