just come out here and I will go home with you...
just woke up and he was jacking off in the corner.. am i being punked?
I can no longer count the number of girls I've banged on my fingers and toes. It's like being born again.
Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
Ahhh November 1st. National Untagging Day
He seriously just asked the doctor if taking the medicine for chlamydia was going to cut into his drinking time. Never let it be said that he is not dedicated.
I just realized I have yet to puke in your new apartment. Clearly we're doing something wrong. On my way over with Cuervo as I type.
He has a landing strip. I repeat he has shaven himself a landing strip. HELPPPP!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just got a msg from someone saved in my phone as "gouiys stAndingg nezxt me not oz". Omh my life.
The grocery store is a combo of ghetto ppl complaining that the low fat chips are all that's left and hipsters trying to eat organic during the hurricane
Bring fortys. we have the duct tape. its onnn mothafuckaaaa
Virginity is like the pottery barn-you break it, you bought it.
Thanks....I've always wanted my vagina compared to an overpriced coffee table
i woke up soaking wet with shard of glass imbedded in my flesh dangerously close to my dick what happend?!!
BEER BOTTLE SWORD FIGHTHING!!
lets go to sea world and you can just hit on every guy in a wetsuit until you get lucky
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