spell your last name, im trying to find you on facebook
i just looked up and i was like omg ballsack and then i didnt know what to do
Well we were just driving down the street, there was a realtor and a couple walking up the porch of a house for sale, mark sticks his head out, opens his mouth to say something, pukes all down the side of the car, pauses, and yells "THIS IS A PHENOMAL NEIGHBORHOOD YOURE GONNA LOVE IT"
No fucking idea. Just paid for my chipotle in chocolate coins, though. Either there is a huge language barrier happening here, or my big boobs are finally paying off.
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I'm going to be blunt here. I don't actually care what you're doing tonight. I just need to know if I need to shave or not.
you came here, splled a bunch of margaritas, hung up a picture of yourself and then left
I am currently watching him baptize himself in a baby pool with a handle of belvedere while wearing a coral dress.
I want to have sex with him.
We're not on Beacon Street anymore so now your argument about not peeing on the sidewalk holds no water. Whereas my bladder has holded every water.
My signature move is making guys wonder why they bothered in the first place
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Signs of a stoner: trying everything in your fridge topped with peanut butter to seek satisfaction.
Stop your judging. I got free booze AND an oil change. You're the one whose always saying we're spending too much money.
You stopped loving me for a minute.
You sent me "Is nap," I don't think that really counts as a conversation starter.
I promised her before I left that I'd make good choices and then got drunk and fucked my best friend and her boyfriend.
fuck st louis. fuck their hockey. fuck their basball. fuck their football if they still got it. fuck their tiddlywinks teamm. fuck their ribs. fuck their entire city. what im trying to say is i dont like st louis
She's wear your skin crazy! Is it wrong that I'm gonna fuck her 1 more time though?
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