i think i may have caused an international incident at the french embassy, just fyi
hahaha how?
its a long story involving a horse trailer and some shrubbery
whos cum tastes better, a guy who drinks apple juice or cranberry juice?
No. untill you have done a puke that contains nothing but semen and tequila, you do not 'feel my pain'
Telling me its the beginning of school is like telling me the crown royal fairy has come back from vacation.
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Freshman just walked up and thanked me for letting him hide under my bed when the cops showed up to the house last weekend
And in my birthday dress, with my friends, i peed on myself in line for the club. Still went in and partied. I remember pieces
She left me naked in my bed and without my phone I had her give me her phone number on the calculator on my laptop. It might be fake.
When we tried to make a video I set the camera to 3sec pictures accidentally so instead of a movie we have a flipbook of our sex.
I am not working on the very first day I can throw up alcohol that I legally bought and drank.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up to both of you drawing on me in sharpie, unless a glorious threesome was had the night before that is not okay.
Who says it wasn't?
He's mad about lube? You know what, don't even. I'm not in the proper mindset to discuss lube.
I probably would do him if given the chance but how awkward would Bible study be after that.
I just bought six bottles of the 2 dollar vodka. oh yes there will be blood
Oh please. Preoccupy yourself with my penis.
Sooooooooooooo you woke up on a rooftop. Classy
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