im pretty sure i just saw someone trying to catch a fish with his penis
She is my favorite of all the girls you have fucked. Other than me.
why did i wake up to an event notice that says "Shit Just Got Real"?
Theres a disney princess moonbounce on karen st. and I'm drinking beer at a little league field. this might end with me in jail.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
his mom gave me my lost underwear folded up along with the rest of my christmas present. tell me this cannot be happening.
I've also hijacked your can opener. Sadly not for the same sexual reason as the muddler.
Apparently you need a permit for a flamethrower.
Bathroom attendant appreciated that hug I have him as a tip. Fucking BROKE these days.
Trying to find a reliable dealer on Rockfordmugshots.com. Guy arrested for 15 grams of coke could be him !
You realize those people have been ARRESTED recently. right.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your roommate from freshman year just had a baby. I think you're winning. Hooray for fifth year seniors!
I can't tell if I'm getting better at doing my online spanish hw drunk or if my teacher is just grading on creativity. Either way that senoritas gettin an applebees gift card when i graduate.
I'm handling the NHL draft worse than getting dumped this week
My mom just asked me about the teeth marks on my headboard..
He was passed out, face in the toilet, so I just pissed on his head. Serves him right
you can't just call dibs on my vagina bro.
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