Dude, just walked by a homeless guy pissing on the sidewalk while he was screaming at his wang. God, I love this city.
My grandmother just called to say she disowned me. Apparently I uploaded a video to Youtube of me dancing nude with a blow-up doll named Dorothy, last night. You are so fired from being damage control.
hey can you give me head? jesse told me that you're really good
who is this?
jesse's little brother
So there is this guy preaching the word of God outside our club. I went up to him and said, "God made this body, and he made it for premarital sex." Sup, Hell?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just jacked off in the bed i was conceived in.
you went around grabbing cigarettes out of peoples mouths and claiming you were curing cancer.
He rubs his penis on back when he think I'm sleeping
My body is being held together with whiskey, nicotine, duct tape and a little bit of hope...
Just walked into the bar to find a guy in a Boba Fett helmet leaning casually against the wall, texting. This night just got real.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just learned my tits were fire resistant. I should join the freakin circus
he has this weird thing where he watches me pee
A group of drunk Marines just serenaded me, never leaving this place
He's been pretending to be gay for 3 months in order to get free weed.
sometime during the night he found me in the empty hotttub singing marvins room in only my bra.
Hypothetically speaking, if a girl asks you to fuck her wearing only your hockey helmet, is that socially acceptable?
Randomize