i literally laid in bad for an hour last night thinking of what i'm going to name my cats when i become a cat lady.
hey bro how do you do that fake vagina thing with the tp roll? im bored.
hey everyone... booty call? my house tonight. bring friends to fuck my friends.
You mean 'full wolf form' wasn't a drunk text?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we are sitting in a kindergarden classroom alone chugging beer. look at our lives. look at our choices.
Crashed the mayor's bday party, no list for some reason. Wore suits. Ludacris was there.
I'm buying drugs in the library...And it's not even finals time. What has my life become?
I'm gonna do some tripping... In the direction of balls
Just found out that guy A from the threesome I had is now dating guy B's younger sister
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We designated a driver... But it was me..... So we designated another driver
If his smile makes you freak out and drop things imagine what his penis could do
I based a lot of our friendship on the fact that I thought you were crying from feeling so sad for me when I got crabs. I'm not sure if we can ever be as close now.
And he listens to me when I talk to him like the hulk.
Jesus Christ, it's not like going swimming. You don't have to wait 20 minutes after you eat to suck a dick
I'm having to shit out rocks
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