so when we got to the frat house he had a travel sized toothpaste and toothbrush for me and gave me a pair of his shorts and a girl's sorority t shirt...something tells me he's done this before
The reason i havent seen you yet better have huge tits
My boobs grew. They knew we were going to vegas.
I broke the girls bed. I will not apologize about bragging.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dear me: Drinking & crying tonight, my place, 9pm sharp. Love, your life
My mom just told me my dad shaves his pubes while drunk and I don't know how to feel anymore.
him crossdressing on the weekends is awkward but not a deal breaker for me.
I'm mailing you cans of corn and that's final.
I told my mom I'm great in bed. That is quality mother daughter bonding.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
yeah, never be friends with someone with shitty eyebrows.. they obviously already make poor life choices
This mustache is awesome. I can't pass by a mirror without looking in it and thinking damn, I'd like to give that guy a handy.
What is it about fresh air and wanting to talk about penises
I always feel bad for the sober driver... Never been me but I feel bad... empathetic AF
I have a hunchback of notre dame journal from when I was 6 wherein sits a diary entry that reads "saw liar liar today. Carrey's best yet" and that's all.
I woke up with a jacket; in it passport, hockey tickets, sunglasses, credit card, bank transactions
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