I cant talk about it right now or let you guess, but its something you and i would do. Kinda like that time we had the case of beer and went bowling
You hooked up with minors in a golf cart?
bro im too drunk for your spanish code words. did you fuck her or not.
Questioning the dried heart shaped nutella on my boobs. Valentines day has begun.
I woke up to my dog puking on my bed. Looks like it was a successful night for us all.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Having him as a wingman is like telling the girl you already have aids
As I sit on the toilet at 4 am I realize tonight could have gone a lot better
I just realized I'm trading you a pregnancy test for the morning after pill...
It's been a bad semester.
You stole my crutches last night at the bar, the DJ had to ask for them to be returned
Hey Kellie. Me putting. My face intebetaeen ut your boobs made my night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
After we had breakup sex it took him longer to say goodbye to my boobs than it did to me...
I remember sitting in your lap naked saying I don't want to be all looks while you gently rocked me back and forth
you gave me money for the cab and then walked home..
Vodka for breakfast. With a side of Frankenberries. Don't judge me.
He just got home after serving 5 years in prison. And I think I may courtesy fuck him. Best Christmas present ever.
so at target i bought condoms, on sale undies, pasta roni, and martini mix. the old lady who rang me up asked "honey are you a freshman?" yea lady i am, thanks.
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