you definitely held a convo with a hobo
we have a secret handshake
I wish I had more reasons to start sentences with the phrase, "Here's the thing you've got to remember about cougars ...
What I'm saying is Afghanistan is America's sexually contracted disease.
I want to see you every morning in the kitchen ass naykid on roller blades making pancakes.
Stop sending me these texts. This is your mom, not your girlfriend.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No, I'm only going to drink half my paycheck. That's the responsible thing to do.
Sarah Palin just got hired for Fox News. Watch out Jersey Shore... there's a new drinking game in town
he kept whispering yes yes yes yes the entire 15 minutes. i almost wish it was a quickie.
How do guys with small dicks who cheat on their girlfriends get girlfriends!?!
My goal for tonight is to swipe my debit card through those weird rolls on the back of a big bald guy's head.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
soon, soon....
I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus.....
Just beer bonged tequila, broke into the hotel next door and got chased by security. It's spring break
She deliberately backed into the homewrecker's whoremobile and yelled ""FOR SPARTA!"
I wish I had a clear image of the dude who was sucking on my tit outside the bar last night
Is it bad when your own grandmother calls you a whore?
She lured me back to her place with pizza and tits. I was totally helpless
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