i'm signing you up for texting rehab
Do you ever look at a vegetable and think "that would be awesome to shove up my vagina"?
The only problem is i have violated all potential new years resolutions at the new years party.
Nicole wore just a belt and her pedometer and hopped on top of me last night. She "walked" 822 steps before we finished.
New charity walk idea!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
woke up in nothing but a glued-on tiger tail. they used super glue.
He passed out mid-signature
im not picky. i just want someone whod go down on me while im writing my psych midterm paper. thats not a lot to ask.
If I don't come back from Italy with aids I did somethign wrong
There's a questionable stain on Harley's bed...would they have sex on a dog bed?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I slept with someone shorter than me. My vagina weeps.
You fool.
You were so calm and collected as you strolled out the door with 40 mcdonalds cups in your arms. It was legendary.
so is it socially acceptable to send her an "i got my man back you whore" card?
Getting high with your mom, but thinking of you!
I want to disappear from this job like a fart in the wind.💨
Breakfast sounds amazing but can we do IHOP instead? I have to pick up a Plan B pill and there’s a CVS next to it
Randomize