its awkward enough using a urinal next to your dad but its worse finding out hes one of the guys who goes no hands and moans it out
I would rather wake up to a truck driver than wake up to her
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
She woke up laying on my kitchen floor, ketchup bottle as her pillow, in front of my fridge.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm spooning a three legged dog right now. Started drinking whiskey with Breakfast. Best part about being biracial is Irish cousins. Dog Pic Attahed
Well Im currently dressed up as batman raiding frat houses for booze
How did you make it to work sans hangover?
4 words: Clif Bar soaked in tequila. Just like albert pujols
it's a simple rule - pass out shirtless on the couch, become an airsoft target.
I got to the party and found your shoes in a bag of Funyuns. You weren't even there.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just saw a dude dressed as captain america driving down the highway. He saluted me.
yeah, I'm getting gagged by the cock of fate
He just kept mumbling that he was too drunk for society and then he peed in a bush
At the very least, I mastered a nap while occasionally being dry humped.
I appear to have wine on my toes. I am really not clear as to how this happened. I'm gonna have a little lie down.
Let's just wait to see what happens before we start making radical plans and starting fires
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