At this point, I would light birthday candles in my vagina for free drinks
His shirt was in the kitchen sink this morning, I'm pretty sure my roommates know.
Nothing says "This dudes gotta go" better than a boner on your back waking you @ 5 in the morning
I'm on a cruise to the Bahamas and this text message is gunna cost me $10 but I need you to pray on my behalf for the things I'm about to do these 2 girls and what I did last night to a 35 year old mother of 3.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Rent Disney Oceans. Smoke a bowl. Fast forward to the seal section. Then call me.
high in an attic. pig roast in 10.
still in the ER. she tried to shotgun a bottle of corona
Well I squeegeed the puke off your arm at the gas station
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh, that was the alley that I ate a pine cone in.
WAIT MOM THIS DOESNT NEED TO BE A FAMILY EVENT OK AARON DOESNT NEED TO BE AROUND FOR NIPPLEGATE 2014
Can I chase this vodka with an onion?
Hey what are you up to?
I am wear the people with the mustaches live. I have found their home.
DUDE, WE BOUGHT THE ACID TOGETHER.
Little girl was fucking around on the train and completely ran her head into a pole. Totally burst out laughing as she cried. Her mom was not amused. I don't think I should be a Mom. EVER.
i have to pee so bad and he is sleeping and idk where the bathroom or my clothes are!!!
Randomize