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yeah, its right past the deli mart where i showed my right tit for mozzarella sticks.
it was pretty much a given that i would lose my thong on dollar tequilla shot night
All I remember is you introducing yourself to the entire basketball team using the line "I'll show you a slam dunk."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
thanks for being the calm eye of my shit storm.
Drinking vodka and pirating music in the library. Welcome to finals week.
I kinda wanna Instagram the giant vag stain on my sheets. That is something to be proud of. It's a Christmas miracle.
My flask has coffee in it for finals week.. So that's responsible right?
She told me I was absolutely not allowed to sleep with him even though she knows I'm a rule breaker who loves a good challenge.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How drunk is too drunk to be on an airplane?
DIBS on your mom for my beer pong partner.
I'm drunk but I just ate 2 heads of broccoli so does that mean it evens out?
Yes absolutlely
I still have that dildo-suction bruise on my forehead and this sweater STILL smells like my Christmas Eve vomit.
I'm going to target high, just in case I ask you where my paycheck went later
I woke up with my shoes on but pants in the fish tank
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