Can Purell be used as lube?
woke up and her hair clip was clamped around my shaft
Tell her to not eat the pizza she threw up on.
So I'm about to go to his house and have "I'm really sorry for cheating on you last night" sex
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Can I use you as a job reference? Don't tell them i got you fired cause I banged you tho
the fact that he forgave me for making out with the bartender is proof that i can fuck my way out of anything.
So can we talk about how we all three made out with the bike taxi driver in lieu of paying him. I'm not even mad, that's resourceful. You know what married girls would have had to do? They'd have had to pay.
Managed to get through family dinner without anyone knowing I was tripping balls. Christmas miracle. He exists.
Also I just took a shit at a bar so always remember that ANYTHING is possible.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How did "late lunch" turn into 8 solid hours of drinking??? I feel like death.
I met his dad. Turns out he was a one nighter from the nurses conference in Vegas. Not sure how to handle this one.
Clearly, you already have. Both of them.
I think the saddest part about my sex life is that most of it is pity sex.
Jesus Christ. How the fuck do you not tell someone that your wife can see on the phone bill who you text and how many times ?
Of course I fucked her, her man stole my bike when we were kids
Chick in the kitchen making breakfast.. Yours or mine?
Randomize