I'm convinced that Kathy Griffin and Andy Dick are the same person...
i havent had this much fun since the last time i farted and it created a boner.
all we did was drink wine and talk about how people who dont have facebook dont exist.
As per my father's affair, married men are no longer off limits.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
ARE YOU GOING TO SACRIFICE YOUR LIFE FOR MCDONALDS HASHRBOWNS
1 tequila 2 tequila 3 tequila, floor.
*roof
We have six bottles of wine and we are at target buying baby oil to grease up the sleds with, just in case you're interested.
He peed in the bird bath. Those birds are gonna be pissed
I forgive you, at least you vote. I found out my fuck buddy isn't even registered. I won't fuck a non respectable citizen.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently I've told this bouncer I stalk him on Instagram 3 times. I should stop drinking. I only remeber saying it tonight. early sign of Alzheimer's
We're ordering chinese food so if you want to get on this obesity train answer me now.
I told him I wanted to get on him and ride him to Montana. It didnt end like i thought it would.
Come get your boyfriend. He is hammered talking to me about hot dogs and casinos.
It was all going good until I realized she was wearing underwear with a butt flap. Mission aborted.
Never joke about your clitoris.
Randomize