This fat girl in front of me just got on the bus to go 2 blocks. Do you think she ever wonders why shes fat?
don't get me wrong, i love how you're fun and free spirited. but there are some situations...like shooting down a bottle of sambuca standing in the shallow end topless surrounded by my friends
"Does your mom know how big your cock is?" Worst dirty talk I've ever had.
Did i throw a brick at someone last night?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm in the liquor aisle and a 10 yr old boy yells, "My favorite beer is Corona! Daddy remember when you gave me some on our camping trip?"
Turned on my GPS and all that it said in the search bar was "beer,"
I kind of feel like BP. I'm dressed in green and absolutely horrible for the environment.
I just power smoked 3 bongs, ate hot cocoa mix before making hot cocoa, and realized James Spader's character on The Office reminds me of your mom.
Im about to smoke a huge bowl. My penis is so happy. Who needs girls.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Wait do you remember that guy last night asking to use my nose ring to open his beer.......
I'm good. We walked you back to my apartment and you demanded to eat the sandwich I made for him
Dude so help me god I WILL weigh a penis one day
I just found weed in my bra #magicboobs2k16
Did my extra credit for a class I badly need to pass at the bar of Friday's.. kind of sum's up my college career. Got a 90 though.
Well the hawks lost... so, of course, the only logical course of action was a bonfire in the middle of the street.
Randomize