i may or may not have puked on your loofa in the shower.
i did the responsible thing and pissed myself...
He wanted to put Kesha on after he came in my mouth. I had to draw some sort of trashy, gay line.
why is there an outline of nathan's body on my wall in whip cream?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
this is your 3rd pregnancy scare in 2 years, I think its time for you to re-evaluate the whole 'im a lesbian' thing
He said he wouldn't use a condom because he didn't want to kill anymore trees.
I was literally convinced that the turkey wrap i was eating was keeping me alive. And i couldnt have been happier. That high.
Sooo the theme of my 21st is rapidly becoming Gay Mexico
He gave me one look and told me I'm not allowed to board the plane if I'm still as drunk by departure time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You've fucked so many I should get a word bank when you make me guess these things.
no, I didn't go in the end. Too hungover and hot, plus Star Wars is on so obviously I'm having a naked day.
I am one with the molecules
FUCK YOU VODKA I'M TRYING TO ADULT RIGHT NOW
Anyone who does not know who Paul McCartney is does NOT get to put hands in my pants
She’s a Vegas 8, which makes her an Oklahoma 27
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