So me and friend just finished Eiffel towering this girl and sounds great in theory but after the high five has commenced its just a weird threesome especially when you make eye contact with your buddy during the session
i cant get the smell of ass out of my nose
I think its only fitting my first purchase with my student loan is a glass pipe? I think ill name it 'Subsidized'
Would it help you get over me if I told you that I had unprotected sex last night?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh no I havn't even told you about the naked asians yet
oh, i've got big weekend plans. on an unrelated note, do you think viagra will work if the guy is roofied?
When I left you were in the shower in your socks throwing up screaming it was blood but it was "ok" cuz it's recyclable. By the way it was kool aid.
I deserve a fucking award for best roommate. I just cleaned his room, so he can have a 3 some
Don't get me wrong, I love talking about lube and such, but why are we?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Masturbated before I came into work and now the finger scanner won't clock me in. Fuck Valentines Day.
I mean, with your nipple problem im surprised. #hangacoatonem
My hungover walk of shame was interrupted by a stranger on a balcony throwing me a beer to shotgun... at 10 a.m....
Whoever jacked off in MY pong room on the bean bag with your fucking googles pick up your fucking cum towel you gross disgusting fucks. I said NO MORE jacking off in that room. I swear I will empty it out if this is going to continue.
I can't remember what I did last night, but judging from the state of my hair I had a pretty good time.
I knew she was the one when we had sex to the halo soundtrack.
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