i was just at lovers lane looking for gifts for a bachelorette party.....with my mom
She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
I hate having morals and standards the next morning.
I am so fucking pissed, there are no Shamwows in the As Seen on TV Store.
Looks like you'll have to stick to jizzing in socks.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He was putting purell on my boobs saying "they need to be clean for later." He hadn't had a drink all night
she told me i should dip my dick in chocolate and then let her blow me since it was her 2 favorite things. weird or my new valentine for this year?
I made two strippers play rock paper scissors to see who would give me a lap dance last night
Its pretty simple actually, if she texts me either Grr or Rawr it means she is horny and wants to bone. its a perfect system
drunk waterpark is besst waterpark.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My dream had 1 penis and 2 pizzas in it. Priorities?
Apparently throwing balloons filled with vodka off the roof is considered terrorism.
Topless dodge ball cldnt top that
I was trying to pee in the bushes and the person who lived in the house where the bushes were planted started knocking on the window to get me to stop peeing in their bushes
Good news. His dicks gotten wayy bigger since high school. I love Thanksgiving break.
Just got thrown out of the club for making condom water balloons. I'm not ashamed.
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