i just puked in front of my entire floor a girl on crutches asked iof i needed help hahaaa fuck ima damn fool
Britney fell asleep on the couch in the foier, got up stripped then pissed on the floor. Then got dressed and went to sleep in it. Also downstairs toilet clogged. Not me. I will be gone by the time you get home from work. Have fun.
i will soon be in a relationship on fb
you!?
me and your mom. i mean, lisa.
a pedometer??? no beatles?Steve jobs just took a dump in CA and it landed on my heart
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Miss Michigan hasn't even been Miss USA for 24hrs and already stripper pole pics are surfacing. Classy.
we banged on the home plate. i wasnt even aware of the significance of where we were until afterwards hahaha
I just peed next to my dog in the yard. Unparalleled forms of bonding going on over here.
The last thing I remember is sitting in a chair and him hand feeding me bell peppers
Im laying on the couch wishing someone was here to pour wine in my mouth. I need an alcohol IV
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He picked up a chick with a line about the price of used cars in Sri Lanka and developing economies. Step it up.
The international association of gay square dance clubs had a booth set up in the lobby of my hotel.
when you wake up naked in a bed with glowsticks, a rolled ankle, a hangover, and a condom; alone. you wonder shit
Dude it's 6 am and you just invited me to a hotel with a shit ton of coke. Best morning ever
Broken heels while double fisting margaritas, picking up shirtless, bloody men and escorting them out of harms way, the meltdown when I realized I can go without a bra bc my boobs shrunk, the morning vodka red bull you were forced to drink? Which one roped you in?
So then edible panties?
Jesus no he likes candy too much, I'd lose a lip
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