In similar news, my cock is bigger than the plane that landed in the hudson.
i'm at a party where swedish girls are dumping laundry detergent on each other because it glows in blacklight. this is awesome
I envy you so much. I get girls who pee on my floor and you get girls who leave in the middle of the night
You drank everything last night. It was like this huge deconstructed long island that went on for 5 hours
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She actually pushed her roomie out of the way and said 'You already fucked him it's my turn!'
Selling drugs in raindeer antlers is the best way to spread christmas cheer
Just for future reference, me asking if you're free, followed by a winking face is not my way of suggesting a tandem bike ride.
Get a piano. I want to have sex on it.
I cnant read. Cheetos goen. Help. Grt Cheetos.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've never seen a dude bust out of his jacket and rock an air banjo like u
Then when he got home he face timed me and showed me his balls
Was it cause you feel bad for the ridiculousness my vagina goes through because same
I have photo proof.
Girl, don't care. What's my rule? If I don't remember it, it never happened.
All I wanted was a good weekend full of booze, laughs, and maybe some penis. Instead, someone is in the hospital, I didn't sleep at all last night. And not because I got laid.
Just bought shot glasses from the thrift store. I think the guy buying a winter coat was even judging me.
Randomize