Can i not drive my cunt home
i wokr up in ohio with no clothes. i think someone gave me ecstacy. can you come find me please it's cold.
Dude if you're in another zip code it doesn't count
You don't understand. I'm not like you.
all her text said was "asdfhdaufhudshfuds" and i knew that meant come over
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's true- you can buy beer at McDonald's in France. I'm not coming back to the States.
since we're both too lazy to go to each others house, you drink there, i'll drink here and we'll skype. it's the same thing.
Note to self: Don't teach the naked lap rule in beer pong until after youve made a cup..
when the police officer said he was gonna take a picture of the car accident, you asked if you should pose on the hood
OH MY GOD. JESUS STRIPPER. THERE IS A JESUS STRIPPER HERE. A STRIPPER DRESSED AS JESUS.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we're tailgating intramural basketball with hard drugs and tequila...and i think the players are taking shrooms
Waking up in a pool chair wrapped in toilet paper is not what I planned when I agreed to movie night
Why did you come into my room last night at 3am and pour monopoly money on me while you were crying?
Sorry but i am wayy to hungover to take mom to her AA meeting.
Wont she be proud, Hailey.
I lost my bra at his grandma's house so there's that.
Today is a good day to get high. It's easy to blame the glazed-over look in my eye on my new contacts
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