Nakedness is not a toga. Just sayin
That level of neurosis does not find love outside of Grey's Anatomy.
obama could have borrowed sotomayor's dick when he threw out that that first pitch like a girl last night
Either these are mashed potatoes in my pants, or I was drunker than I thought.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I hope whoever gets these locks of love doesn't have a drug test anytime soon
i knew she was high when she broke up the cookies into her glass of milk and ate it like cereal
We aren't going to mix hockey and sex texts tonight.
I totally agree. all sexting is on hold till after the games over.
Playoffs. This shit is serious.
My brother just put in eyedrops to talk to my mom on the phone
He told me that I smelled like a Glade Plug-in, then sang the Menard's jingle in it's entirety in between kissing me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This dude was wearing a "Plan B- One Step" backpack. I wonder how many more I have to buy until I get mine??
If you were a good friend you would take the nipple tassels off me before the ambulance comes.
He simply fell in the fire, rolled out and continued to finish his bottle of vodka. Everyone else instantly sobered up just watching it.
I don't know what to think. Also, I decided to take a bath...sorry in advance if I flood the bathroom.
Eventually I will start sleeping with people who actually want to hangout with me the next day... But not today
I was totes going to lose it to him last night, but I cried and we ate mexican food instead.
Randomize