I must be too annoying 4 u.
WHOA. WHOA. WTF. WHOA. TOO HIGH FOR HIM TO BE ENGAGED RIGHT NOW.
You said you were going to take the sideview mirror to your own car so that nobody would steal it. Thats why you woke up with it.
Guess who left Professor Cunt on their paper by accident?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
WHAT THE FUCK. SUCH A BAD IDEA. YOU'RE NO LONGER IN CHARGE OF NOSE SUBSTANCES.
whoever put homecoming and halloween on the same weekend owes me a new liver and a get out of jail free card.
I keep confusing the name of her and her dog. Both are appropriate.
I borrowed a glass of wine. And the bottle. Your cat said it was ok
I bought an american flag today and by god im gonna fuck someone on it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dilemas of the modern woman: deciding whether or not to write on your ex's wall for his birthday. This is serious.
Why did you just send me a picture of your dinner?
CAUSE LOOK HOW MUCH SPAGHETTI I'M EATING
The best part of the night was you shouting "I have to take the LSAT tomorrow" between shots of fireball.
I mixed Jack with hot chocolate. This may be the best or worst idea ever. I have yet to find that out
He totally sucks at sexting. He sent me a clothed shot of his ass captioned "I know this gets you going." What?
We were making fun of some people having sex on the beach, an hour later we were having sex on a golf course
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