any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
shes 19, drunk and said she has no gag reflex. im trying to decide if i have scruples
you dont
i dont
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
i'm too drunk to leave my room. poked my head out like a turtle and everyone knew i wasn't sober. i like it better in my nonjudgmental turtle shell anyway.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I get off at the next exit which doesn't have a shoulder, a guy is riding my ass so I cant stop. I think I got as much puke on his car as on mine.
My mom opened up my bank statement today....my first alcohol intervention class is at 7:30am tomorrow.
I'll have party bus drop you off in the morning.
There is booty call etiquette, and he just isn't following it. I'm not making you breakfast, gtfo.
It's gotten so bad I typed my will out on my phone in case it's over.
How many band members does it take to become The Band Slut? I think I might be dangerously close
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That all sounds beautiful. All I have to offer is my shining personality, extensive amounts of space knowledge, and I hear I am pretty not sucky at sucking dick
is it too soon to tell him I'm available anytime for Christmas themed pity sex and I'll even wear a Santa hat?
I'm beginning a new chapter of my life in which our fridge will always be stocked with jello shots. I'm excited to embark down this road to fruity, semi-solid alcoholism.
I'm writing to thank you for your never ending commitment to my orgasms and also to apologize if any physical harm was done due to your impressive efforts. Hopefully the sex and post sex pizza made up for it.
It's been so long since I had sex I might propose to the next girl who will sleep with me.
He showed his fake to the cop and was like "does the coloring look off to you?"
Randomize