dude i just made a burrito by wrapping 2 packs of scooby snacks with a fruit roll up. im so high
you make it seem like sunflower seeds and pinot grigio are not in the food pyramid.
Only mom could turn an abortion day into a shopping day
So befoe we go on this mission how reliable are you for bailing peope out of jail
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
best friends dont let best friends get an STD of the eyeball just saying
I say we start a new tradition. I came up with it all by myself. It's called work out, lay out, black out
It's like an R Kelly music video in here. Only a matter of time before someone pisses on someone
From one hot mess to another... Get it together.
"I'm 95% straight," he says. Cut to him on his knees...by far the most beautiful guy I've ever fucked.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I still don't know his name but his ass is spectacular. Like he should never wear pants.
day drinking caused me to be in bed at a decent time. can't complain.
Do you remember when you first moved into my parents house with me and we came home to find that my dad bolted the headboard to the wall
Philosophical question for you: is it better to go into work slightly drunk or slightly coked out?
I FOUND A VIBRATOR IN MY BABY BROTHERS ROOM. IM FREAKIN OUT MAN ITS BIGGER THEN MINE
put it back and chill out ok
NO FUCK HES 15 WHO EVEN SOLD HIM THAT HES A BABY
she brought her phone charger to the bar this bitch is ready to drink
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