Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
i wish that i had sketchier friends so that it would be easier to get drugs
I just took went to the bathroom and it smelt like blue curococo... I didn't flush yet so head on up if you wanna know what a good night smells like.
we found you outside the hotel room sleeping with a note next to you that said " we made sure you were comfortable, hope your friends come back soon"
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I just threw up trying to put pants on. This is obviously a sign to stay naked.
I'm sitting at home, day drinking, while watching crossroads with brittany spears. I'm not the person you should be asking for advice right now.
Oh my Christ. I just came so hard my penis stood back up and took a bow afterwards. I need Thai food.
Oh god he's like Julia Roberts in pretty woman... And I'm the one who's gotta make a lady out of him.
he said he did everything he could to puke on his nurses because they were doing everything wrong
Thats admirable.
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my life is about to be the like the hunger games except with penises. and im going to win.
We passed my parents while I was giving him road head...that awkward
We just took back to back grav bong hits and are playing battleship. She guessed Z - 12 so weve switched board games.
Only I could host a baby shower where the cops get called.
Told the cab driver to take me to narnia last night. Turns out there's a bar called narnia on the south side of town. We are in business
As a friend tho, you have the biggest dick I've ever seen
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